Bringing babies to bars at cocktail hour
Story found on SFGate.com.
These days, little children are brought along to places that would have been considered inappropriate a generation ago: four-star restaurants, cocktail parties, rock concerts. But for all the sniping from adults who resent this territorial invasion, the onslaught shows no sign of letting up. In fact, one of its latest flash points is the local bar.
When the owners of Union Hall - a moody, dark-paneled bar and brunch spot in the Park Slope section of Brooklyn - recently posted a sign that read “Please, No Strollers” under another one reading “No One Under 21 Admitted,” they did not see it as a declaration of war with the neighborhood’s sizable population of young parents.
“The word gets out that this is a place for baby buggies to go, we end up with 8 to 10 strollers, or 15,” said Jim Carden, an owner. He explained that the goal was simply to make sure that the preferred transportation for toddlers of the stay-at-home parents who had adopted the lounge as an afternoon hangout would not crowd out the regular patrons.
Perhaps he underestimated the neighborhood’s vocal and proactive parents. Local parenting blogs were soon bristling with denunciations.
“This was a perfect winter moms’ group place for those of us with infants going stir-crazy,” wrote one woman on Only the Blog Knows Brooklyn, wondering testily why local mothers could not at least drop in for “a beer once a week when it’s not crowded.”
Of course, the practice of bringing babies and young children to bars is hardly exclusive to Park Slope. The issue has been debated in online message boards in cities like Minneapolis, Philadelphia and Washington.
A woman in Boston, recently posting to Yelp.com, a national, user-generated city-guide site, seemed appalled to see a 7-year-old next to her at a bar. (”There were cubes, crayons and candy on top of the bar,” she wrote. “Does anyone else think there’s something wrong with that?”)
In England, the JD Wetherspoon chain of pubs recently implemented a rule making sure that parents who bring young children not only eat a meal, but stay for no more than two rounds. After a recent smoking ban, more families have been bringing children to pubs, and a spokesman for the chain was quoted by the BBC as saying, “Once the children have had their meal, we can’t see a reason why they should still be in the pub.”
In New York, too, the smoking ban has altered the bar’s image. No longer a den of adult sin, the local tavern is now seen as an attractive option for afternoon gatherings among parents. (Neither New York state nor city law forbids minors in bars, although state regulations say children under 16 must be accompanied by an adult, a State Liquor Authority spokesman said.)
It makes extra sense, parents said, in Park Slope, where the demarcation between generations has blurred - in Brooklyn, hoodies and skateboard sneakers constitute a uniform for parents as well as their 5-year-olds.
While critics of bringing children to bars are vocal, some parents have embraced the habit with gusto. In recent years, mothers in Manhattan gathered for Wednesday afternoon cocktail mixers called Tots and Tonic. One former attendee, Christen Clifford, a writer and actress, proudly recalled breast feeding her son, Felix, at the bar before ordering a martini.
It’s one way of denying that your youthful exploits come with a shelf life, she acknowledged. “Psychologically, you feel like, ‘Oh, my life hasn’t changed that much,’ ” she said, “although of course it completely has.”
Neal Pollack, the author of the book “Alternadad,” said that Generation X parents - the types who sport gray whiskers in their beards and Vampire Weekend downloads on their iPods - “value lifestyle above most things.”
“I don’t think it’s a bad thing that people want to continue a semblance of their pre-parenthood lifestyle,” said Pollack, who lives in Los Angeles. Going to rock shows and bars, he added, is “just what their lives were.”
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